“Come on, Jesus! Come onnnn, Jesus!”
William, or Willy B. On line casino King, as he preferred to name himself, watched the
wheels of the slot machine spin, spin, spin.
Nothing else mattered. Not the complimentary drinks plied by pleasant
waitresses, not the din of different gamblers or the chink of their chips, not even
the muffled pleasure of the unbridled make-it-rich-quick avarice on the ground
of the Home Guidelines On line casino on this nice metropolis of Atlantic Metropolis. William’s
whole universe had collapsed to these three little wheels.
He was going to win the massive one. He knew it. May really feel it in his bones. He
was due. He couldn’t have dropped ten G’s on this machine tonight for nothing.
True, he’d misplaced a bit cash right here. However he was a wise man. Through the years
he had damaged even. If he hadn’t, but continued to gamble, then he would in
reality be fairly silly.
Sadly he was truly feeling fairly silly proper now, camped out in
entrance of a slot machine with hypnotic blinking lights, his fats rump sorely
perched on a thin stool beneath the perpetually sunny afternoon lighting close to
a cardboard signal which learn “Our slots are looser than our sluts”.
Wiliam’s luck, good or in poor health, would now be decided by these final rotations of
the one-armed bandit’s three wheels. He had dropped his final quarter within the
slot, and it was now deep inside the bowels of this machine.
His coronary heart raced. Sweat matted his brown hair to his forehead. He was on a
gambler’s excessive. He may really feel the facility, the positive factor, coursing via his
physique, via his loins, giving his groin a stiffy which may hammer nails.
He would break the gambler’s fallacy.
One cherry.
Two. Two cherries!
Two cherries and… a pear?
A fucking pear?
“Jesus fuck! Jesus fucking Christ!” William wailed on the machine.
He stood abruptly, knocking over his stool, inflicting the now empty plastic
quarter-holding cup, which he had purloined from the DOE throughout his training
czar days, to bounce off the tiled ground.
He bent to raised yell on the slot machine.
“Give me again my goddamn cash!”
“Excuse me sir?”
William was startled out of his rage. He blinked as he checked out a person with
short-cropped hair and an costly swimsuit who was flexing muscle groups gained from a
jail weight lifting program. One other equally well-built and well-groomed
safety man stood behind him.
“Would you include us, please?” the primary safety man mentioned.
“Why?”
“There’s some discrepancy along with your invoice,” the safety man replied.
Concern nibbled at William’s copious entrails. As he adopted the 2 males to a
personal on line casino elevator, he tried to calculate his win-to-loss ratio all through
the years.
He had misplaced a bit cash tonight, true. However, when you tallied up all of the wins
and losses through the years he had been playing, he had actually damaged even. And
hell, he was bringing the on line casino worthwhile income, so that they owed him, rattling it.
“The place are we going?” he requested, his chest swelling with righteous indignation
as he adopted the 2 safety males like a bit unhousebroken pet.
The safety males ignored him, however made sure he entered the elevator with
them. One pressed the button for the penthouse suite.
“I mentioned, the place are we going?” William repeated. He used the steely-toned voice
which had introduced addicts to their knees throughout his drug czar days.
One guard eyed him like a fats sack of smelly trash he would actually slightly not
take care of. The guard slowly flexed his mammoth hand, casually cracking the
knuckles as he made a fist each bit as broad as William’s mouth.
William, with as a lot dignity as he may muster, gulped and stared on the rug
on the ground. It had a pleasant floral sample.
Lastly one of many guards spoke.
“Hey, aren’t you that fats douchebag? You already know, the one at all times yapping about
ethical duty and shit?”
“I’m a nationally famend speaker on advantage,” William mentioned, slowly and
succinctly.
“Proper,” the guard mentioned. He and his companion exchanged glances and snickered.
“And but right here he’s, Mister Advantage, on his strategy to see the Odd Father.”
“You already know,” the opposite guard mentioned. “I believe I learn one in every of your books throughout my
penal expertise. However I don’t bear in mind you ever speaking about playing.”
“Nicely, playing isn’t actually one of many seven lethal sins which we should all
guard in opposition to to make our nation nice,” William mentioned.
“Yeah? Nicely I appear to recollect gluttony was one, and also you positive are a fats
porker.”
“He’s fats, and he’s on his strategy to see the Odd Father,” the opposite guard mentioned.
“He’s screwed.”
“Not but he isn’t.”
Each guards began laughing at that. William grew very, very uncomfortable.
Lastly the elevator arrived, a small ding asserting the penthouse lobby had
been reached. The 2 guardians exited the elevator, one holding the door for
William whereas the opposite opened a pair of ornate oaken doorways on the finish of the
lobby.
“The don will see you now,” he mentioned.
William walked previous. His knees felt very week.
He walked right into a wonderland of pastel, floral prints, jasmine scents and throw
pillows. Dominating the creamy material was a boulder wearing a topaz bounce
swimsuit.
The Odd Father was a middle-aged man with lengthy jowls, a doughy nostril and no
neck. Unfastened, wiry grey hair which was nicely groomed sat atop his slowly
encroaching brow. His heavy-lidded eyes made him look half asleep, however
glowed with animalistic crafty.
“Billy, Billy, Billy,” he mentioned. His voice was like a low grumble blended with an
articulate nasal wheeze. “Do you thoughts if I name you Billy?”
“Truly, I favor Mister William.”
“Billy, Billy, Billy, do you have got any concept of why I referred to as you right here tonight?”
“As a result of I misplaced a bit cash tonight?” William mentioned, hope in his voice.
The Odd Father smiled, his jowls splitting into two cottony cheeks.
“Billy, Billy, Billy. You owe us some huge cash. And never only for tonight.
In case you don’t thoughts me saying so, I believe you have got a slight playing drawback
there, Billy.”
“I don’t have a playing drawback!” William mentioned, pondering this jerk sounds simply
like my spouse.
As soon as once more the Odd Father gave a gradual smile.
“You’re into us for $8 million, Billy. I name that an issue.”
“I’m good for it!”
“Yeah, however that silly e-book of your virtues isn’t promoting prefer it used to, so
a few of us are getting a bit frightened.”
The Odd Father draped a very pleasant hand throughout William’s shoulders.
“However I’m not frightened,” the don mentioned. “Actually I invited you right here that will help you
repay a bit of that debt.”
William ignored the Odd Father’s finger, which evenly caressed the hair by his
ear.
“As an ethical chief,” William mentioned, “I can’t condone your life-style and discover it
morally repugnant.”
“Sure, nevertheless it doesn’t harm anyone however me. Not like your playing.”
“I object to that. I don’t gamble away the household milk cash. What I do with
my cash is my enterprise.”
“Ditto with my schlong. And, so long as it solely enters consenting adults, what
I do with my schlong received’t destroy the nation. However I such as you child, so I’ll
provide you with a sporting likelihood.”
The don reached right into a pocket within the hip of his bounce swimsuit and pulled out a
silver coin.
“I’ll flip this coin. Heads, you win. Tails, I get your tail. Capice?”
“OK,” William mentioned. He had issue choking out these syllables across the
coronary heart he abruptly discovered lodged in his throat.
The coin flipped via the air, its sides glinting within the mild. It fell on
the plush rug, bounced, bounced once more, and sat. Tails stared forlornly up at
William.
“Why don’t you bend down there to select that up?” the Odd Father mentioned.
William did so, giving the Odd Father an eyeful of ass.
“Hey! This coin has two tails!” William mentioned. “You tricked me!”
The Odd Father threw again his head and laughed, his physique shaking with the
effort.
“It is a on line casino, Billy, constructed on the proceeds from different casinos. And the
one, overriding rule of each on line casino is that the home at all times has the sting, and
the mark, err, I imply patron, by no means breaks even.”
“That’s not honest!”
“We’ll simply should conform to disagree,” the Odd Father mentioned. “Now, when you’ll
bend over and grasp your ankles, we are able to get began. Ohh, earlier than you do…”
The Odd Father reached over to a desk containing a big bowl of plastic
margarine packets blended with ice. He picked out one packet and tossed it to
William.
“This can assist,” he mentioned. “Now, let’s do one final tango for Paris.”
William sighed. He dropped his trousers slowly and reluctantly, opened the
packet, smeared a number of the yellow lard on his finger, and goosed himself until
he leaked olea.
The Odd Father bought behind William, saying “Open broad. However not too broad, ’trigger
I prefer it tight.”
William grimaced as he felt the blunt, scorching fleshy fringe of one thing poke
in opposition to his puckered starfish.
“Shit!” he mentioned.
“That’s one of the best a part of sodomy,” the Odd Father mentioned as he thrust like a
runner sliding into house.
***
Two hours later, William waddled to the rostrum in entrance of an viewers of three
thousand, all of whom waited with breathless anticipation for his ethical
steerage.
William did some calculations in his head. Three thousand, at $10 a head.
No matter his take, he would quickly be again on the Home Guidelines. And this time
he’d win! And win large, gaining again every thing he’d ever misplaced.
He waited for the applause to die down, then addressed the gang.
“Good night. Tonight I’d like to speak about unfastened dwelling, hypocrisy, and the
evils of homosexuality.”
William solely hoped nobody within the crowd would discover how filled with shit he and his
trousers have been.